I was browsing Facebook and came across a girl who was Just Diagnosed with Depression.
January 25th, 2017
Michelle
Who is smart and will talk to me? I have a lot of questions about depression. Like do we treat people the same as other people treat them. Are we nicer because we are depressed. Or negative to the ones closest to us. Why am I mad at my husband because he is happy? How does depression make me not care in places I should? Does anyone else want to run away? Have you done it? I did, I went to Florida to the beautiful beaches and I guess even tho I did not pack depression with me, it jumped on board. I could have had so much fun but this horrible feeling made me lethargic and miserable the whole time. Now I want to go try again ha ha
Brynn Savas Do you see a therapist?-admin
Michelle
No, I guess I need to lol
I shared these memes with her to show someone cared
At this Point I Shared My Story as a way to connect with her and let her know she is not alone.
Scott Wajda
Scott W
I seem to remember that I was always depressed. I think my environment played a big role in my depression. Trauma also played a role. I seemed to be happy as a kid, but I think I depended on my parents. When I joined ACOA my life got better. Then I moved to Illinois and started ACOA here. I felt alone and afraid. I was paralyzed with fear and wouldn't do anything. I couldn't help myself, I think I knew there was some steps I could have taken to alleviate my fears, but it was really hard.
I lived in a nursing home for a while and then in 2009 I started going back to church and through prayer and participation in the church, I accepted Christ's forgiveness for my past and became ready to allow Jesus to open my heart to love and be able to love others, including myself. During this time, I was pardoned from the nursing home and attended Trilogy, immersing myself in groups.
I moved out of the nursing home and now have my own apartment. I am very active in my church community and I enjoy life so much more now than I did before. Trilogy has been a major support of mine. I come to Trilogy five days a week, I have connected with several people who previously resided at Albany Care and have formed stronger bonds with them. I find myself much more at peace with myself and the world around me. I love and accept people for who they are and their situations in life. I believe I've made progress but there is more to learn.
Unconditional love and acceptance are possibly both community wide and on a personal level. Progress, no matter how little, is attainable. I want to share my story with you, not just to inspire others, but also to let myself know where I am and where I've been.
Her Response to My Story
Michelle
Wow that's intense sounds like a lot of work out of the bottom of a deep hole. Good for you. And like it says it's not easy. I have been blaming my self for my depression. I did not entertain the idea it was not my fault till last week. I'm trying to do things like vitamins ect. But if I'm depressed I don't want to take the vitamin I'm curious about depression. Is it controllable? Is it my fault? Why do some people have it and some not? Will I be like this forever. The top thing you posted said you moved and were depressed there. All I want to do is run far away. I'm thinking I can't outrun 05it now. Can people move and out run it? Something really awesome has to happen to get me of pilot. I wake dreading the day. I don't want that. I want to look at life like I get to! not have to! Is it me being negative? Is it the depression? I feel like if I understand the beast I can defeat it! But I also think it makes me more caring for others and I love that. I worry for others that are sad. Someone need to think of the person that lost their cat and tell them it's gonna be ok, and they are loved. Is it just depressed people that do that or no? See I have a lot of questions. I need counseling I know, but are these questions counselors will answer or people that suffer from it? Is everyone affected the same that has it? If another person tells me they're depressed does that mean they feel what I feel or are they feeling something else? What can I expect from counseling can they really help?
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Scott Wajda I'll try to answer this when I am at a computer right now I am on my phone.
I'll tell you what I told one of my friends who like you wanted to leave it all behind. "Where ever you go, there you are ".
Michelle
OK thank you I would really appreciate that Scott.
This is the point at which I answered her Questions Based on My Experience.
#1 Scott Wajda Is it controllable?
Yes, If you're ready and willing to accept your depression?
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#2 Scott Wajda Is it my fault?
No, My depression, I believe began in childhood. From an abject fear of my mother, my family moved in the second half of my second-grade year to Peru South America, I began wetting the bed my mother's solution which had been passed down from her parents was to spank me for each occurrence, which happened daily. Even as I got older and stopped wetting the bed my mother continued to discipline me in this manner. Which turned into a way for her to release her anger and frustration from having to raise my father and my sister and I this is more of an example of Environmental depression though most depression is due to a chemical imbalance in the brain. This maybe too much information but I'm extremely detail oriented.
#3 Scott Wajda Why do some people have it and some not?
Excellent Question?
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#4 Scott Wajda Will I be like this forever?
Medications have been proven to "Help" though it may take several attempts to find a medication that will help you?
You are in Control over your life if you "choose" to be.
Participating in Life has been a Major benefit in my recovery, "I am in Control", though I have never found out if in fact I have a chemical imbalance. I do take Medication each day.
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#5 Scott Wajda Can people move and out run it?
No, though you may change your environment, You brought - yourself - to wherever you went. The circumstances of your old environment may change and be relieved.
A different set of circumstances are waiting for you?
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#6 Scott Wajda Something really awesome has to happen to get me of - ???pilot -??? I wake dreading the day. I don't want that. I want to look at life like I get to! not have to! Is it me being negative? Is it the depression?............
When I accepted reality things began to improve --- I Accepted that "YES" I am Depressed and I require medication to "Help" treat my depression.
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#7 Scott Wajda I feel like if I understand the beast.........
Yes knowledge is power - How do I use the knowledge that I have gained for my benefit?
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#8 Scott Wajda But I also think it makes me more caring for others and I love that. I worry for others that are sad
Watch yourself, You are unable to --help -- those who do not want it.
They may not be "experiencing" life the same as you? -- and remember?
They are not You!!!! ---- If you become involved in another's situation or problem you may become lost in their sickness and find yourself even more - depressed or lost than you are now.
If I Scott Wajda am not looking out for - #1 Myself - my ability to help others is Greatly Impacted.
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#9 Scott Wajda Someone need to think of the person that lost their cat and tell them it's gonna be ok, and they are loved ----
Yes, this is true. --- Reference answer Above.
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#10 Scott Wajda Is it just depressed people that do that or no?
- No, -
All Humans have a need to be loved and to love. ---- I love all 7.5 Billion people on this Earth Equally, there are varying degrees to which I LOVE the people in my daily life. ---
Though I need to accept love to heal --- I choose What kind of LOVE to Give and Receive,
as well as - WHO - to accept love from and When, Where and HOW.
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#11 Scott Wajda Is everyone affected the same that has it? (depression)
- No, -
We are all Humans and have different thoughts, feelings and experiences.
No two are necessarily the same, though circumstances may be similar.
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Us It's not so much others answering your questions. It's you hunny those are the questions you have to figure out yourself. We may have the same questions but it's different reasons and meanings for everyone.
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Michelle
Im starting to get that! That's not an easy fix. It would be a lot easier if some one told me what to do, I could do it and this would go away :) ya! That's what I want. :)
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Annmarie Me too!
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Scott Wajda If you don't figure things out for yourself you'll never heal properly?
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Dawn
Part of depression is also anger. Not all people depressed cry. I am an angry depressed. I snap at people, I push people away, I get my feeling hurt easy, I envy others.
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